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Sunday, January 16, 2005
I will remember today as the day I realized there are significant consequences to disrupting the natural course of things.
After I took out the trash, it seemed like my wife and I kept walking into one another. In fact, as I tried to put a new bag into the now empty trashcan it seemed like things were getting worse. Every time I turned around, she was there and vice versa. I swear I heard the dog talk. I also suspect that there was a moment of world peace that had gone unnoticed. We concluded that the reason these things were happening was because I had opened a wormhole and we had momentarily stepped into a parallel universe.
How could such a simple household chore cause such a reaction?
It’s because I did what she asked and I did it the first time she asked. Not only that, but I had replaced the bag without her having to tell me. This is not the way things are done in our house so I caused a ripple in the fabric of time through the desecration of a solid precedent.
This is a dangerous thing to do, people. I’m here to tell you that my life was nearly altered permanently because I stepped outside the box of nature’s process. Therefore, the next time you have to repeat yourself to your children just remember that they are doing their part to hold the universe together.
Your kids are heroic.
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